Hey Kevin - Gotta know:
What are your favorite munchies if you've smoked up? Favorite place to smoke?
I'm not a munchies-oriented stoner. I've trained myself to want exactly two things while I'm blazing: productivity and sex. When I smoke weed, I either wanna record/cut a bunch of podcasts, create a TV show, write HIT SOMEBODY, read and respond on Twitter (@ThatKevinSmith)... or fuck. Poor @JenSchwalbach is the patient recipient of loads of green-induce nuts, but the good thing? She's the only one I turn to for my base, inhuman needs. So in that way, weed fortifies my fidelity to my wife.
Look, I'll come up with ANY reason to defend my ganja. Don't try to take it away from me...
How butthurt are you after last night's game?
The Kings have played like unstoppable beasts in the playoffs and they might've pulled off the Cup win even without the Bernier 5 minute major. The lack of consistency with the officiating was frustrating all throughout the season, but especially last night, in such an important game.
That all being said? I'm not butt-hurt. I'm proud of Jersey's Team! They fought hard and made yet another Stanley Cup finals appearance. That makes them better than 28 teams in the league. They did not lay down for Los Angeles.
But a first-time Cup winning franchise isn't something to mourn as a hockey fan...
True - I'd have loved to see Marty lift Lord Stanley's chalice one more time. I'll just have to wait 365 days 'til then...
I had a really awesome time at the Red State premier at Radio City Music Hall! So much so that I drew this when I got home. Wd love to go to an event like that again!
Nicely done, sir.
Next SModcast Pictures Presents tour is with the Slamdance winning flick BINDLESTIFFS - which is about three high school kids who go ape-shit when CATCHER IN THE RYE is banned in their school.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qahkCMIJzeU
Easily one of the funniest flicks I've ever seen.
Next year, SModcast Pictures will do another RED STATE USA-type tour with our first animated feature, JAY & SILENT BOB'S SUPER GROOVY CARTOON MOVIE. We'll show the flick then Q&A after, all of which we'll eventually podcast. We learned a lot touring RED STATE, so we wanna put it to use on BINDLESTIFFS and the cartoon JAY & SILENT BOB flick.
Hey Kevin, thanks for doing another AMA! What's the plan for Smodcast Pictures' future? How do you plan to keep up with the constantly changing structure of online distribution and pirating?
Pirates don't scare me: they help me. Naturally, you'd like everyone to pay for what they're taking if you're selling it, but to be honest, even the pirates spread the word and eventually spend their booty on your shit. I heard from lots of folks who stole RED STATE off UseNet or BitTorrent who then added "...and now I'm buying it on BluRay." It's a try-before-you-buy culture now, so SModCo tries to put more free into the world than stuff you gotta pay for.
All the podcasts at SModcast.com are free: http://smodcast.com All the shows on S.I.T are free: http://www.youtube.com/seesmod Spoilers is free: http://tinyurl.com/SpoilersEp1 or http://tinyurl.com/SpoilersEp2
The SModCo business model is to give out as much stuff free as possible so that when we DO ask for your money for something, you'll feel better about it because you've gotten lotsa funny for free previously.
Is there ever going to be another Clerks Movie? Or how about Jay and Silent Bob? Have you considered doing a Jay and Silent Bob vs. Zombies movie?
There will be another Jay & Silent Bob flick next year: JAY & SILENT BOB'S SUPER GROOVY CARTOON MOVIE!
As for CLERKS... Well, I'm working on something for Dante and Randal right now, in my spare time...
J and SB vs my anus would be even better.
If I'm doing the fucking? It'll be a short film.
I hope Kevin answers, but when I saw him a couple months ago he said he was done with movies. I guess that could change but it didn't sound like he was that interested in making more movies.
I'm done directing film for the movie theaters, yes. Got one more to do then I wanna spend the rest of my life trying out some of the other arts as well.
A life in the arts rocks, kids. Leads to fun shit like this...
http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLFBE8D735339AD977&feature=edit_ok
Thanks a million for Dogma! That is all.
I remember sitting in church at age 13 and starting to write that movie without even knowing it. I'm the kind of Catholic that snickers whenever the priest said "Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord..." I been cumming with the Lord's name since I been shooting pearls out my pea-shooter.
But I recently returned to my childhood parish to take a look around: Our Lady of Perpetual Help in Highlands. It was trippy: Mister Tauro (an usher from my childhood) was still there, passing out the collection basket like he did when I was a pup.
OLPH is where DOGMA came from: On the church's 100th anniversary in 1983, the diocese and Rome allowed OLPH to offer plenary indulgences for anyone who passed through the church's front doors on the appointed celebration day. So I was 13 when the ideas for DOGMA started forming. 15 years later, I'd make a movie about some dopey shit I used to think about/struggle with while sitting in church Sunday after Sunday.
I need a variation of that famous Christian bumper sticker JESUS IS MY CO-PILOT that reads instead JESUS IS MY CO-WRITER.
Wanna see what young Kev looked like? This is me and Jason Mewes, circa 1991...
http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLFBE8D735339AD977&feature=edit_ok
two part question:
a) could you beat whedon in arm-wrestling, and
b) prove it.
thanks.
Sure: I beat Whedon in arm-wrestling, then suddenly Hulk fucking side-punches me out the frame like I'm Thor.
Ackbar knows "IT'S A TRAP!!!"
Are Salma Hayek's tits as fantastic in life as they are on screen?
I learned from an early age that I'm a sucker for the dickless set. So in an effort to keep shit civil and fair across the boards, I've always been a neck-up kinda guy.
Don't get me wrong: I love titties as much as the next lesbian. But libido can cloud judgment and make a guy act a fool. So from 14 on, I've always tried to deal with women like I deal with men: from the neck up. I don't stare at dudes' tits or dicks: why, then, would I ogle chicks I'm not fucking or have no chance of ever fucking. There's a time for looking at breasts: It's when the shirt's coming off and she's smiling at you lustily. 'til that glorious moment ever happened, it was always eyes-to-eyes for me. It's all friendly until someone wants to cum.
You can't get anything done in this life if you're constantly thinking "I wonder what she looks like naked...?" about every woman you meet. Best to treat 'em all like you treat the guys.
That's why I dig my wife so much. Jen Schwalbach is a woman I can ogle the fuck out of and it's civil, proper, even expected and preferred. With her, I'm all neck-DOWN. Not even sure Jen has eyes, to be honest. But fuck, does she have lady parts that tickle my dick.
I do a podcast with my wife and you can even HEAR what a pussy-whipped poon-hound I am for her: http://smodcast.com/channels/plus-one/
Has any celeb ever responded to a story you told about them in one of your "evening withs?"
Nope.
Unless you count Affleck.
I have always loved you for the movies, but then I just read your article " I haven't taken my shirt off since I was nine". It touched me deeply. I am a lady who grew up in a "fat" family. I have three older sisters and my oldest sister would be considered the horrible word obese. I love how candid you are and always are. Your genuine quality is infectious and beautiful, as it streams out in all you add to the world. I am going to get your book now, as I can tell I would love it. I do not really have a question. I just want to say thanks, from the fatties, the nerds, the creative sensitive souls, Thank You!
Truth is best. And I don't mean that in a parent/priest/teacher kinda way. I mean it this way: When you are candid and store no skeletons in your closet, nobody can ever have anything on you. Don't ever let anyone make you hide - unless it's at the behest of some kid counting to twenty out loud.
Be open. Let 'em know you be you. You be you and nobody else. And if you being you is being fat, too? You be you. Fuck 'em. There are chubby-chasers everywhere in this world.
Fat people rock. Been one my whole life and it's shaped who I am (pun intended). I'm a Fat Man. A Fat Man... who loves Batman.
I even have a podcast about it: http://itunes.apple.com/podcast/fat-man-on-batman-smodcast.com/id532661418?mt=2
How do you feel about writing something and letting someone else direct it?
Indifferent.
I just wanted to say I loved Red State. Brilliant film IMO. After seeing the fan reaction to the movie, have you considered making another along those lines? I know you are getting out of the biz and all, but you still must think about it?
I love RED STATE, too. So fucking much. It was art from start to finish (which still hasn't happened yet).
Did you ever see the Cooper Family album? http://goddamnsusa.com/
And if you ever get time, listen to the RED STATE OF THE UNION Q&A CLASS podcasts: http://smodcast.com/channels/red-state-of-the-union-qa/
One more to whore: http://coopersdell.com/
Any plans for another Jay and Silent Bob movie?
A cartoon version, yes.
JAY & SILENT BOB'S SUPER GROOVY CARTOON MOVIE!
We're cartoon whores here at SModCo. We used to do a cartoon monthly, but now we're doing cartoons WEEKLY: http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL58D4A3CB5FBA7DA9&feature=plpp
Hey Kevin, I really loved watching the first season of Comic Book Men. Please tell me there's going to be another season!
I loved watching it WAY more than you or anyone else because those are my boys up there. I've known Bry and Walt for most of my life now and have always found them to be insanely unique true originals. One-off brains are tough to find in this world and I've found a few in my lifetime: Bry and Walt are fucking diamonds in a sea of shit.
I can't wait to watch 'em again this fall! Season 2 starts shooting soon and it sounds like the boys will be coming west for my ComicCon panel in Hall H on Saturday night! Which means they'll be at my late-night ComicCon BABBLE-ON afterwards: http://www.livenation.com/event/0A004884A19F26F5
But until COMIC BOOK MEN returns, give a listen to the companion podcast, THE SECRET STASH: http://smodcast.com/channels/the-secret-stash/
And if you wanna wear a sweet STASH STAFF t-shirt like Walt, Bry, Ming or Mike, grab that shit here: http://redbankstash.com/
Hi Kevin big fan. I live in Chicago where is the show? My friend owns a bar in Chicago can I buy you some drinks? no homo
I'm coming to Chicago THIS THURSDAY to do "An Evening with Kevin Smith" Q&A-type shenanigans at the CHICAGO THEATRE: http://www.tbs.com/justforlaughschicago/stories/story/0,,261458,00.html
It's part of JUST FOR LAUGHS CHICAGO. The whole evening's kinda like a live version of AskMeAnything - with less typing and more sweating.
How do you feel about the LA Kings winning their first cup last night?
Answered elsewhere in this very AMA, sir.
But in an effort not to waste this post, I'll use this space to whore my wares a little bit...
Jay & Silent Bob's Secret Stash http://redbankstash.com/
SModCo SMerchandise http://smodcast.com/smerchandise/
kevin aside from batman what would be the superhero movie you would love to make?
No interest in making those flicks. Just wanna watch 'em.
And soon? The DARK KNIGHT RISES...
'til then? I'll have to content myself talking to the Joker: http://itunes.apple.com/podcast/fat-man-on-batman-smodcast.com/id532661418?mt=2
Regarding Red State. It's been noted on here, you originally wanted the ending to be more religious and less political.... as in, an actual Rapture happening. Is this true? If so, how did you plan on that ending being?
Love your work, thanks.
edit: added spoiler tag
I think I talk about the ending in KEVIN SMITH: BURN IN HELL: http://movies.netflix.com/WiMovie/Kevin_Smith_Burn_in_Hell/70236163?trkid=2361637
That's on Netflix. HULU streams some of our stuff, too - including our new show SPOILERS: http://tinyurl.com/SpoilersEp1 http://tinyurl.com/SpoilersEp2
In fact, here are ALL the places you can stream SModCo shit: http://smodcast.com/streaming/
I posted this on your last AMA but since I have another chance now...
I met my now-husband back in 1999 and our first "date" was a movie at a friend's house, where he introduced me to Clerks. I was a little iffy on the idea of a black and white, low-budget movie until the "In a row?" line - after that I was hooked. It turned out to be the jumping off point for our relationship and our mutual love of all things Kevin.
We went to see you do the Q&A in Red Bank for the summer movie series, and we shared a lot of great times watching all your movies and "Evening with..." DVDs. We both only half-jokingly credit you for bringing us together. So basically, thanks for everything you do!
Edit: Forgot my question. What are you reading now?
I love stories like that. Proud to say that my dopey flicks have made lots of couples and kids over the years. I've met many babies named Randal and Brodie. I should start a dating service.
But since I brought you two together? I get to claim Prima Nocta rights.
Re: Books - Not reading anything at the moment but the last book I read was THE DEVIL AND BOBBY HULL.
Hi Kev! Glad to see you doing an AMA. I am big fan of Smodcast and Hollywood Babble-on(I'm wearing a signed Garmy shirt)
*You spoke of doing a more laid back show with Ralph, in format more like Smodcast. Is this going to happen? I would like to hear more like the morning show you did awhile back.
*Also, since you recent full immersion into weed, have you considered smoking with your fans? I know your a very cautious person(many well enjoyed Smodcasts has made this obvious) and was wondering how afraid you are of joining one of fans stoner circles?
*If you were forced to pick a 5 year period from history to be sent back to, what period would you pick? Your arrival date will be randomly picked from the 5 year period, meaning that you will arrive somewhere in the 5 year period. Also this is a one way trip, and there will be no return to the present. You can only bring with you what you can carry and already have access to, meaning anything you already own or can buy within one hour (budget limited to your current holdings) that you can carry.
1) Ralph and I are working on a BABBLE spin-off at the moment. More details when I have them. Expect some CREEPY CLOWN: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P8aIhJCAvjw&list=UUMUyXED1r2JjVHtcHJd_aUg&index=5&feature=plcp And maybe a l'il BOWIE DANCE, too: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hDykHKFtj4Y&list=UUMUyXED1r2JjVHtcHJd_aUg&index=8&feature=plcp
2) To paraphrase George Thorogood? I smoke alone. With nobody else. The reason for this is because when I share joints, I tend to get a cold sore within 24 hours. I've got the non-genital herpes, y'see: the lip shits.
But also? When I smoke, I'm usually working. I made a deal with myself when I decided to become an avid stoner at age 38 (Kids! Wait 'til you're 38! You'll really need weed then!), and that deal was this: smoke all you want, but just make sure you're being productive while you do so. That means the moment I light up, I'm recording a podcast. Or cutting a podcast. Or writing a script. Or cutting a movie. Or shooting a TV show. Or recording a song. Or opening a podcast theatre. Or dreaming up dopey shit to do.
SModCo was BUILT on weed, sir. Everything we've put together in the last two years came from seeds that likely originated in Amsterdam. It's the Why Not era of my life, in which I try fun shit just to see if it can be done. And it was all conceived in a puff of smoke.
And wait'll you see what we're doing NEXT.
But if you wanna hang with me while THC runs through my system, join me on SPOILERS! It's not sharing a joint but you get to see a free movie and be on the show. Sign up here: http://smodcast.com/spoilers/
3) Forced? Can I choose my own personal history? A fella can get killed time-traveling through world history. I don't wanna witness my own death in an airport while I'm wearing a bad wig.
I'd go back to 1989 to 1994. That's when I started hanging out with Walt and Bry, met Mewes, worked at Quick Stop/R.S.T. That five year period is largely responsible for everything you've seen me do since CLERKS. It was an age of magic and wonder that's somehow extended even to today. And I know what happens after the five year period, so I'm okay with the one-way trip. And I'd change nothing: not even the non-flight on Fatty-Lesbian-SaggyPants-Haters Air.
Hi Kevin, I'm a huge fan! I loved the movie Red State, although it disturbed me to the core given how realistic it was, especially since I live in the Bible Belt. What inspired you to do this movie?
Also, fuck what other bitches say about Jason Mewes, you're definitely the cute one.
1) RED STATE came from seeing an interview my friend Malcolm Ingram did with Fred Phelps for his documentary SMALL TOWN GAY BAR. http://movies.netflix.com/movie/Small_Town_Gay_Bar/70044323 It also came from seeing FROM DUSK 'TIL DAWN in 1995 and falling in love with Michael Parks.
2) But Mewes has the bigger dick.
Mewes is a real inspiration, man. Motherfucker REALLY turned his shit around. 2 years and change ago, he was down for the count. Now? Dude's my business partner on the production side of things in SModCo. Sells out tours in the UK/Ireland and Australia. He masters his demons every day by putting all the truth about what happened out there every week on JAY & SILENT BOB GET OLD. If you haven't listened to it yet, let one of the best podcasts on the internet tickle your ear-pussy: http://smodcast.com/channels/jay-silent-bob-get-old/
And peep out the MEWES NEWS every week on SModCo Internet Television: http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLAB34018CA14FE70A&feature=plpp
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I earn like a Republican but I feel like a Democrat. That being said, I'm not very political. I just make pretend for a living.
Then again, so do politicians.
A poster a couple of months back told this story about a gay experience he had with Scott Mosier when he was a kid. Any chance you could ask him about this story on SModcast? I can see it being hilarious.
I know you've spoken briefly about making Clerks 3 as a play and I was wondering if this does happpen, are you planning on the filming it at any point? Any chance of being able to see it in the UK?
How close are you to finishing Hit Somebody and when does it start filming?
I've been listening to SModcast from the very beginning, I used to frequent your board a lot before you moved it to the new site, I remember the first teaser for it (GABBO GABBO GABBO style) and I just wanted to let you know how much SModcast means to me and has truly gotten me through some rough times in my life, on occasion being the only thing I've looked forward to, so thank you so much for your endless providing of entertainment. I know this isn't a question and you probably get it all the time, but you mean a lot, man. I even have the number 37 tattooed on my leg.
1) If anyone's making out with Mosier, it's gonna be me!
2) Ask me again in a month...
3) Ask me again in a month...
4) That means the world to me. I especially love the people who love SModcast.com because it's the story of my life. SModcast.com is one giant podcast biography. http://smodcast.com
Hey Kevin, been a fan of yours for ages.
Two things:
Sorry about your Devils, but praying to a false god is never a good idea. Batman provides...especially to Saint Wheaton.
You mentioned in one of your Q&A's that you wrote Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back before you smoked weed on a regular basis. Looking back at that movie now, how accurate do you feel you portrayed the "stoner experience"?
You served as an inspiration for my own podcast, so you have my undying manlove. Cheers
1) Wheaton jumped on the Bat-wagon AFTER I started praying to him. Set phasors on "punk".
2) Having watched STRIKE BACK stoned within the last few years, I was content that I'd not shamed stoner nation.
That being said, as much weed as I've smoked since then? I've never seen a dog talk to me.
But Shecky seems like she's trying to tell me something... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=seMeJHvGB1I&list=PLFBE8D735339AD977&index=5&feature=plpp_video
Any plans to try and resurrect the CLERKS animated series?
Yes. So watch the shit out of it on HULU so I can bring those plans into fruition: http://www.hulu.com/search?query=Clerks+Uncensored&st=0&fs=
But we're gonna need Dave Mandel. He's the genius behind "Who is driving? Oh my God - BEAR is driving! How can that be?" Fascinating, funny guy full of comedic integrity. Listen to me SMinterview him here: http://smodcast.com/episodes/dave-mandel-part-1/
Your mini review of Avengers?
Skeet. Skeet. HULK SMASH! Skeet.
Tell me your thoughts on 50 Shades of Grey and how it has impacted your sex life.
I read two pages. That shit was TAME. But my standard may be different, as I regularly Tweet about eating my wife's asshole.
50 Shades of Brown, bitch...
ever shit your pants?
Not yet. 41 years and counting...
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I never had the Dark Knight piss himself. He said very clearly that he had a bladder spasm. And a fireman friend (Brian Quinn of @BryWaltQ and Impractical Jokers on TruTV) gave me that info/insight. He said when hit with an intense blast of heat from a fire, you can leak a little. Think about when you step into a hot shower and how almost immediately, you gotta whiz; now multiply that by a thousand. It happens in real life so I included it in the story. Total cry-babies went ape-shit, moaning "You have no right to do that to Batman's continuity!"
And then, mere months later, DC destroyed Batman's continuity altogether when they rebooted the entire DCU.
To me? A bladder spasm seems mild by comparison...
What was it like working with George Carlin?
It was what I imagine it'd been like to work with Mark Twain. Or Will Rogers. Or Lenny Bruce. Or Jesus. You just KNEW you were spending time with a legend who changed things. In the words of Lord Buckley, George stomped upon the terra.
I wrote a whole chapter about it in my book, TOUGH SHIT. http://www.ToughShitKev.com
Have you seen Rampart with Woody Harrelson? How was it?
I been around these Reddit parts long enough to know that's kinda funny, sir...
Hey Kevin, I don't have a question for you...I just wanted to thank you for everything. You are my hero, plain and simple. Tough Shit is one of the best books ive ever read. It gave me a nice kick in the ass to start getting shit done.
Thanks, man. Shit like that puts steam in a man's stride.
TOUGH SHIT is a powerful document for change. Handle with care... http://ToughShitKev.com
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The good folks at HULU are working on getting SPOILERS to SModCo fans outside of the U.S. I'll let you know when I get any news.
Just wanted to say that I really enjoy your movies, hell I even like jersey girl (even paid to see it.) I was wondering how far along you are with the script or production of hit somebody. I can't wait to see it. Also are you still thinking about production when hit somebody is finished. Look foward to hearing from you. Oh yeah feel better about your self because I'm way fatter then you are.
HIT SOMEBODY is in it's warm-up skate right now. Hope to see it come over the boards by the end of the year.
Meantime, read some early HIT SOMEBODY here... http://silentbobspeaks.com/?p=413
And here... http://silentbobspeaks.com/?p=414
SMODcast:
I have listened to every single smodcast, every babble-on, every TESD and most of the rest of them. I only discovered SMODCAST a year ago and have listened to at least an hour a day since.
I'm finally catching up!
So, my question is:
What, in your opinion is the funniest piece of an SMODcast (with you and scott) to date?
The Red Sovine stuff almost made me die I laughed so hard.
The Red Sovine/Jerry Reed stuff was pretty awesome.
But one of my all-time faves is still ALL OF THEM WITCHES... http://smodcast.com/episodes/all-of-them-witches/
The Julian Sands/Warlock shit is so wonderfully fucking wacky.
Only with Scott Mosier does magic like that happen...
Which future project are you most excited about?
Teleportation. And flying cars.
How's Hit Somebody coming?!?
Hard. In the pants.
Hi Kevin,
Have you any plans to do some shows in England at any more southern locations? Would be great to see you and jay or scott in Bristol!
Next trip there, we'll do Bristol - promise!
'til then? Watch us in England and Scotland! JAY AND SILENT BOB GET OLD: TEABAGGING IN THE UK http://www.amazon.com/Jay-Silent-Bob-Get-Old/dp/B007WW94TW
Regarding the great dialog that often comes up in your movies is it based more on personal experience with people and friends or just a product of your mind/imagination?
The dialogue I write tends to be wishful thinking: it's my idealized version of how everyone would speak if we were all as eloquent and quick as Bugs Bunny.
Kevin, First of all you're awesome and I hope life keeps treating you well.
Three questions:
What has been your favorite movie to shoot, and why?
Is Bruce Willis as big of a badass as the characters he portrays?
Last, who is the biggest asshole in hollywood?
Thanks, and remember, boners always come straight from the heart.
1) Fave to shoot was CLERKS II. For me, it was the last good time of the View Askew era.
2) The word "ass" certainly comes to mind. So does "bad". Just not close together. I wrote about it in TOUGH SHIT - which you can read or LISTEN to: http://ToughShitKev.com
3) I'm the biggest asshole in Hollywood because I never stop producing free shit...
http://www.youtube.com/seesmod
http://tinyurl.com/SpoilersEp1
http://tinyurl.com/SpoilersEp2
I'm going about this business all wrong...
I remember hearing on the smodcast that you used to be able to suck your own dick. What the fuck is that like and why the fuck would you ever tell everyone about it?
When I was 18/19, I was limber and adventurous enough to go where no man has gone before. I laid on my bed, threw my thunder thighs back over my head and sank that shit neck deep betwixt my lips, furiously jerking like a mad man. I remember thinking "If I break my neck here, I hope in the midst of their horror and grief, my parents are just a little bit proud, too..."
When I nutted, my thoughts shifted to "I guess I'm not gay - because I feel awkward as fuck right now..." Not repulsed, mind you: It just wasn't for me.
But just to sure, I tried it again. Two more times.
Alright: Five.
It always seemed like a good idea until I came. After that, my gut drooping on my forehead, the previously sex-nuts libido-beast playing Hyde-the-salami would give way to the more practical, less adventurous and utterly honest Dr. Jekyll. Suddenly, the horned-up human pretzel who nearly snapped a spine getting his cock into his own mouth would find himself thinking "I look like Jabba the Hutt eating his own tail..."
I wouldn't recommend it this exercise is spoo-tility to every guy, as there's a good chance you'll break your neck and die in pursuit of an orgasm - which is stupid.
And as for why I'd ever wanna share that information...
How many people do YOU know who've ever successfully sucked their own dicks? Fuck an Oscar: THAT'S a goddamned accomplishment! It's like walking on the moon! And giant steps are what you take, self-sucking 'til you splooge.
I hope my neck don't break - self-sucking 'til I splooge.
I can't suck for-ev-er - self-sucking 'til I splooge.
We can suck to-ge-ther - self-sucking 'til, self-sucking 'til we splooge.
Some.
May say...
ahem
This moment of truth sponsored by Captain Fantastic and S.I.T. - SModCo Internet Television! http://www.youtube.com/seesmod
Have you ever considered creating a Roku channel like famous podcasters like Leo Laporte did with TWIT?
I will now!
Leo is an OG gangsta podcaster. I like how he rolls.
Kevin two questions:
1st: What ever happened to the Clerks II inaction figures? Was looking forward to the Elias figure, as well as the Sexy Stud.
2nd: Do you still own the custom arcade cabinets that were at the West Coast stash?
Thanks!
1) The economy collapsed. They're not cheap to produce but we may bring them back to life this next year!
2) I totally do.
That's a wrap, folks! Thanks for your time and interest. Shit like this is like a nice workout for a writer: Keeps you sharp.
Before I go, if I can give a total stranger something more valuable that money, it's this T.E. Lawrence quote...
"Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that all was vanity; but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act their dream with open eyes, and make it possible." - T.E. Lawrence
Be a Day Dreamer. It's like playing God.
And now, the plugs...
CHICAGO! I'm gonna be balls-deep in you on THURSDAY NIGHT: http://www.tbs.com/justforlaughschicago/stories/story/0,,261458,00.html Come to a real, live AMA! It's just like this but I type less and sweat more!
Love movies? Why the fuck aren't you watching my new Hulu show SPOILERS? http://tinyurl.com/SpoilersEp1 http://tinyurl.com/SpoilersEp2
Wanna be ON Spoilers? Sign up here: http://smodcast.com/spoilers/
This is my new podcast, FAT MAN ON BATMAN: http://itunes.apple.com/podcast/fat-man-on-batman-smodcast.com/id532661418?mt=2 In the current episode, I sit down with Luke SkyTALKER: the legendary Mark Hamill tells us all about being the Joker!
Listen to how much this girl wants to fuck me on a brand new PLUS ONE: http://smodcast.com/channels/plus-one/
"I will NOT leave it on the dock!": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5w78VbHsumA&list=UUMUyXED1r2JjVHtcHJd_aUg&index=5&feature=plcp
Get baked and watch some excellent cartoons! http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL58D4A3CB5FBA7DA9&feature=plpp
Love the COMIC BOOK MEN? Then visit them at the Red Bank Stash: http://redbankstash.com/
Love SModCo? Then buy some SMerch: http://smodcast.com/smerchandise/
SMarchive is like SModCo Babies: http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLFBE8D735339AD977&feature=edit_ok
And if you like to read? TOUGH SHIT: http://ToughShitKev.com
See you over the summer,
Kevin https://twitter.com/#!/ThatKevinSmith
