Chuck Palahniuk

April 17, 2013

Hello, yo, hi, I'm Chuck Palahniuk the worst best bad writr. Neither can I spell or keyboard. Ask away.

No, officer, I have not been drinking. What makes you -- hic -- ask?

I seems that North Korea has shot my sattelite web provider out of the sky. But I'm back. My web-based upsets are spoiling Dennis W's big date at the movies, tonight -- Sorry Dennis

If I disappear for a minute, feel free to check this excerpt of the infamous "cat story"... http://byl.nr/YQT4GV

Fingers crossed.

April 22nd -- me again. I'll be dropping in from time to time, trying to mop up a few more questions. This forum is so new to me, thank you for your patience. Namaste. ( I can't believe i just said namaste )

April 30th -- A huge Thank You to Village Books in Bellingham, and to the Wild Buffalo, and to the readers who came to throw their balls in the air in yet another experiment around making book events NOT suck. And I have to boast and gloat... Didn't I tell you how funny Monica Drake is? I saw all of you roaring with laughter. That's why Chelsea had to call a beer break: No one could follow Monica. She was so freaking-funny. Here, today, I'm back to field a couple more questions, see below...

May 8th -- Hah! I can't believe they still allow me to revise this thing. A special "Thank You" to teacher David Nathan in Bellaire, Texas, for the awesome letter. You assign a pretty gutsy reading list.



Chuck,

What offends you? What makes you recoil and say "that's way too much"? How do you respond to people or things that offend you?

What offends me? Waste offends me, or great ideas that never get developed. I want to steal from every writer I meet who shares a brilliant idea that he or she will never complete.

I'm not fond of Haggis, either. Sorry Irvine.


Did Irvine Welsh offer you haggis?

That's MISTER Welsh to you. The guy is a god. Beth should thank her lucky stars.


Hello!

Two questions for you Mr. Palahniuk.

  1. Rant was originally described as a scifi trilogy, any chance we’ll get a second book set in that universe / story arc?
  2. With St. Helens Book shop now closed, will there be another method for us to get inscribed books from you?

Thank you for your time!

Argh! The Rant question comes back! I've written the second book, but I'm such a compulsive nut-job that I'm still looking for a non-fiction form to use as a structure. I know, I know, I'm stuck on structural gimicks, but experiments like that are important to me.

Thank you for asking abou Lori's store -- before that, LuAnne's store -- may they rest in peace. We're still casting around for a new method of inscribing books. Thank you for your patience!


How do you feel about Patrice O'Neal calling Fight Club "The white man's Scarface"?

Patricia O'Neal said that? I loved her in Hud, but I'm not sure what she meant. Sigh.


Chuck,

Have you ever gotten Stuck on a pool drain while masturbating? Asking for a friend.

I loved that you preficed that with my name. See, I can't spell. Prefficed? SEE Phonix has ruined me for life.

And no, I can't swim a stroke and live in mortal fear of swimming pools.


While I read Guts I barked like a dog and vomited.

THAT sounds like a good time. I did the same thing when I read 'The Lovely Bones.' Marky Mark can play ANY role.


I loved that you preficed that with my name. See, I can't spell. Prefficed? SEE Phonix has ruined me for life.

And no, I can't swim a stroke and live in mortal fear of swimming pools.

I meant to write "Phonics"


I played Guts on audiobook with my (then) gf on a road trip (with no previous knowledge of the story).

She started crying, and asked me how I could allow her to hear such a horrible thing. She was upset I didn't shelter her.

We broke up shortly after.

I would, sincerely, like to thank you.

She sounds fragile and high-maintenance. You most likely dodged a bullet. I used to force potential romances to watch "The Piano" or "Out of Africa" and if they enjoyed the movie I'd never contact them again.


Recently you came out as being gay, do you think that this will affect the way people view your writing?

Recently? Like, when I was 13. But God forbid I get moved to that ghetto called the "Gay and Lesbian Shelf."


Even in short sentences you capture my heart

Witness my great keyboarding skills. It's like a chicken is in my kitchen right now. Only a chicken could probably spell better. And a chicken would know when to use 'that' versus 'which.'


Just wanted you to know that, in case that "gay dictatorship" the nutjobs are always going on about ever comes true, I say you should be our Supreme Ruler.

At this point, I'd take any job that offered health insurance and a retirement plan. Hello, colleges? Until I find gainful employment you may contribute roughly 25 cents to my well being by linking to Amazon -- here: http://byl.nr/XPW2Mj -- and reading the story Phoenix. ( did that sound whore-y? )


Are you wearing fresh inner pants?

Fresh "inner" pants? At last, someone who speaks my language. And yes, I am. Why do you ask?


Hey Chuck, I've been a huge fan of yours ever since I could get my hand on one of your books. One of my big questions is how you manage to do research for the books you write. Two main ones are Fight Club and Survivor. Both go very in-depth on how to do various things that aren't common knowledge, from making soap, to cleaning basically everything in a house. How did you go about researching for these things?

Not to lose anybody his job... but some very stoned guys came from Stanley Steamer and taught me the blood-cleaning stuff. And this was ten years before Sunshine Cleaning. Althought I laughed out foamy hurl when Emily Blunt fell face-down on the gore-soaked mattress.


What are you drinking? Just curious.

Nothing, yet. But that does sound like a pick-up line. What are YOU drinking? (wink wink )


Hello Chuck! Thank you for all your incredible work!

My question: one of my rhetoric professors once told our class that we could always look to other authors for influence and guidance, but we would never be able to emulate their writing style, regardless of how hard we tried. Who is that author to you, and what is your favorite work of theirs?

Thank you!

To be brutally honest, I can do a mean drag version of Amy Hemple or Monica Drake, but my version will never have their depth and thoughtfulness.


No question. Just sharing the picture I took of your ass at the last signing event of yours I went to. http://i.imgur.com/wO2KFeV.jpg

How sweet. I can never have enough pictures of my ass. 'Guess the Christmas card is settled for this year.


First I have to say you're my favorite modern author and maybe even of all time, but I do have a few things to ask.

  1. How do you approach writing? Do you plot the whole thing out first or just start writing? Do you do it in chronological order or some other way?

  2. How happy are you with your work? Are you an author who feels they just can't perfect their book or do you reach a point where it feels done and there's nothing more you can do?

  3. Any suggestions for someone interested in writing?

  4. Do you ever feel limited by fight club? I mean this in that every book I own of yours has the words fight club on the cover. Do you want to be known for another book besides fight club?

  5. Do you ever regret writing fight club? I ask this because it's definitely become a very popular piece of work, but is commonly misunderstood. Anthony Burgess I know really regretted writing a clockwork orange because many misinterpreted it as encouraging violence when really it was about growing up and actually discouraged it.

Sorry if this is a lot of questions. I'll be happy just reading the AMA and won't mind if you answer none or just a few.

Hey, you wear me out! Are expecting college credit for this? Let's start with Question #2. There's an old saying: "No piece of writing is ever finished, it's just abandoned." But my own rule is: "No piece of work is done until you want to kill everyone involved in the publishing process, especially yourself." As far as regret, I think that's the sign of a well-lived life. If I grew old without having big regrets, I'd regret my caution.

My best writing advice? Write something that people might not "enjoy" but will never forget. ( i.e. "Guts" or "Phoenix" -- again, http://byl.nr/XPW2Mj ) Our tastes change with time, and something that persists has a chance of getting appreciated more in the future.


Hi, Mr. Palahniuk,

I'm doing my senior year research paper on Invisible Monsters, and I was wondering if there was any perspective you could give me on any part of the book that most people don't think about or realize? It would be incredibly helpful.

Thank you for doing this.

Hello Mr. Pirate,

My original goal, back when I had integrity, was to write all my books with two-word oxymoron titles -- Fight Club, Invisible Monsters, etc. 'Survivor' was first called 'Unnatural Disasters.' But I loved how monsters are usually defined by their appearance, so how could one be invisible and still be regarded as a monster? Think on THAT.


If you are helping people with homework. I could really use some help in my calc class.

As Mr. Lockhart would tell you, I have no head for numbers. He's dead from cancer, and I never did well in Algebra, etc. because it was too painful to ask him for help. No one ever told the poor man but he reeked of tar and nicotine so horribly that we'd rather fail his class than have him lean close and breath by our desk.

Look him up in old Columbia High yearbooks. This post, alone, proves I'm the real chuck.


According to Chucks Facebook this is a fraud.The real one will be up soon

https://www.facebook.com/chuckpalahniuk?hc_location=stream

EDIT: now his facebook is saying this is real,in true Palahniuk fashion. Bravo

EDIT: im so confused

Sorry, I'm no fraud. Just an idiot. A monkey with a stick could type faster, and what looks like stylish, voicey, burnt tongue is actually just typos.


Thank you for being vigilant, we really appreciate users who are on the lookout for fakes.

However, he has now tweeted out a direct link to this post and also posted it to his facebook page, so we're good to go.

Sorry, that was my slip-up. I hit the wrong button and found myself far, far away. But the oxymoron thing-y I said was me, and I meant to post it here.


Classic Palahniuk.

Classic Mr. F--k Up. That's me.


[deleted]

Oh, that I were so smart. You've confused me with the ghost of David Foster Wallace. ( he typed sadly )


Chuck Palahniuk and Morgan Freeman are hanging out.

I saw that, last week. Morgan Freeman would never lie, and you're a big racist if you say otherwise. If not for him I'd know nothing about penguins.

But there WAS the homo subtext between him and Tim Robbins, no?


Actually he just posted this link.

He did. I'm like Jack Nickelson at the end of 'The Shining,' stumbling around inside that stupid hedge maze.


Mr. Palahniuk,

I was wondering, as a novelist with a goodly number of published works, do you find yourself, perhaps unknowingly, falling into certain conventions that you've used before? Stated more clearly, do you find that you've developed an aesthetic or system by which you tend to write your books? If so, do you welcome these tendencies or fight them? How do you keep things fresh?

Thanks

Yes, I hope he answers this one, too.

The rub is that if you change style people feel betrayed -- witness the huge schism between early and later fans of the Star Wars films and the Woody Allen films. That said, I flushed most of the past two years down the toilet, shedding my favorite tics and violating every writing rule taught to me by Tom Spanbauer. My style is becoming baroque, as is my spelling. I yearn now to be the dirty-minded Henry James. Stay tuned for "Beautiful You" the book that will put my master plan of "Gonzo Erotica" into effect.


Yes, I hope he answers this one, too.

The rub is that if you change style people feel betrayed -- witness the huge schism between early and later fans of the Star Wars films and the Woody Allen films. That said, I flushed most of the past two years down the toilet, shedding my favorite tics and violating every writing rule taught to me by Tom Spanbauer. My style is becoming baroque, as is my spelling. I yearn now to be the dirty-minded Henry James. Stay tuned for "Beautiful You" the book that will put my master plan of "Gonzo Erotica" into effect.

No choruses. Lots of adverbs. Gordon Lish will put out a hit on me.


I am Chuck's shitty internet

When I was your age, all we had was some waxed string stretched between tin cans. You had to read because movies were silent. Why, I remember Robert Frost telling me.... (snore, snore, snore)


Chuck,

I work at a funeral home as an aspiring director and have no idea what to do with my hands. Do I clasp them in front of me? Do I put them behind me? How about in the pockets?

I feel that, because I have found myself in this funerial quandary, any opinion you provide will be satisfactory and appreciated.

Thank you.

Easy! Watch 'The Hunger' and study how the vampire, Marian, arranges her not-dead-yet lovers. That thing she does with David Bowie's hands... brilliant.

No thanks needed. Glad I could help. (please, cremate me)


A few years ago my friend wrote a letter to you and in return you sent her a huge box of random stuff. Do you just send people things from laying around the house? I always wondered that. Thanks.

Random stuff! Sometimes I takes me days to compile a box. Usually -- and I'm getting more careful about this -- I look for clever, useful, beautifully packaged things. My theory is that if I vary them it's more likely at least one thing will occur as a delight for you.

( secret? I try to send smells, sounds, flavors, and i avoid sending more words. gosh i hate to type. )


I received a box from you while I was in high school. I wrote to you for a class project and was the only student to get a response to their letter. You also signed Fight Club for for, autographed a packet of sunflower seeds, candy, fireworks, and you handmade me a necklace. The letter you sent back was fantastic and very memorable. Thanks for doing that for some high school kid. It really made me happy.

Ha! I hope your classmates envied you. Nothing -- in high school -- would feel sweeter than that kind of victory. People tell me that when my strange, almost-anonymous boxes arrive they generate fear ( a bomb? ) followed by confusion and ultimately joy. The resolution of anxiety feels like joy. "Joy Bombs" would be a good name for the packages, but that just sounds stooooopid.


My english teacher claims the continuous theme throughout Fight Club is homosexuality/sexual tension between Tyler and Joe. Is this true?

This is what people ( gay people ) always say about Nick and Jay in 'The Great Gatsby.' Pleeze. It's so 1970's identity politics.

To settle this, please tell her or him that if he/she teaches my stuff he's/she's very brave ( remember Mr. V in the Bronx? ) so he may say whatever he or she likes.


Hey Chuck,

When I was 12, I stole Fight Club from a Barnes & Noble. You instantly became my favorite author after that. Do you have a P.O. box I can send the $12 I still owe you from my klepto phase?

Honestly? I stole a huge copy of "The Joy of Sex" from a Waldenbooks in 1975 ( 1976? ). I put it in my pants, no kidding. And if you stole a paperback then you only owe me about 25 cents. Go to http://byl.nr/XPW2Mj and read 'Phoenix' and we'll be even. You'll go to Heaven and be with the angels.


I am impressed, you are clearly more talented than I. Honestly, I figured you don't really need my twelve bucks and I was shamelessly trying to get you to talk to me. I have purchased Phoenix, I feel very happy now, and I am unremorseful for my thievery.

Bless you, my son, go in peace...


Chuck, I just wanted to tell you that when I graduated I was voted most likely to become the next Chuck Palahniuk. Sadly, I have since lost sight of that goal. What advice would you have for me?

You should set your sights a little higher. Try to be the next Chelsea Cain. She should feel your hot breath on the back of her neck as she writes, knowing that you're gaining on her. ( hee hee )


Do you hate Pasco/Kennewick Washington as much as I do?

I have to drive through there from time to time out of Portland. I have had my car broken into twice in Pasco.

Ah, my old stomping ( getting stomped on, I mean ) grounds. Me? I'm from the thriving sub-sub-suburb of Burbank, outside of Pasco. I only go back because I know people buried in the Tri-Cities.

( way to go, Palahniuk, bring the chat room down )


Did you know your books are the most commonly stolen items in chapters, so they keep them behind the cashier's counter in a locked cabinet?

Yes, and for a long, long time Salman Rushdie's books were locked up with mine because people would stuff them in the toilets. True story.


[deleted]

Here's your awful proof... When I was in high school ( columbia high, fight 'til you die, go coyotes! ) the jocks used to stand in the hallways and yell, "Palahniuk, suck my dick!" See, it rhymes. The chorus of my teen years. And a handy nemonic device for pronouncing my surname. Yes, this is me.


"The chorus of my teen years."

God, that is such a Chuck Palahniuk line. Welcome to Reddit, Mr. Palahniuk. Please continue writing fantastic stories and inventing wonderful characters and I'll continue spending money just to see more of your name on my bookshelf.

The gift of a shitty teen-hood is that everything that comes afterward feels like gravy.


He spelled mnemonic wrong. it's him.

I hate you for your vastly superior spelling ability. Must you wield it like such a club?


Hi, Mr Palahniuk, I don't really have a question, more of a 'thank you' than anything. Thank you for all the amazing words you've written and the stories you've created. I'm sure you hear a lot of this, but your books have changed my life. Everything you write feels like you're punching me in the gut with words, and I guess I'm a masochist because all I want is for you to punch me harder. I first read Fight Club when I was fourteen after my mother got sick of the depths of my teenage agnst and gave it to me, telling me that was where I was heading if I kept brooding the way I did. I have never felt more complimented in my life. From that moment on I've been obsessed. I've read all your books a bunch of times (and I think Rant is criminally underrated, no one ever gets my time travel/rabies jokes when I crack them), and I always find something new in them that I can take away and hold in me for the rest of my life. Invisible Monsters, in particular. No other book before or since has affected me quite as much as Invisible Monsters does. The way that you can turn the world into this horrifying place, but still make it funny and occasionally touching always managed to make me feel better no matter how bad things get. Your words always make me feel so much less alone. Your words made me work on becoming a better writer. You are grotesquely, hilariously, depressingly, nauseatingly good at what you do, and I look forward to seeing you do more of it for as long as you can.

So again, thank you. And now I have to run to work, thanks for making me late, dude.

See? This is why I hate doing this. You just broke my heart. You busted my heart and then just scooted off to work.

And to think that I broke a date with Daniel Tosh just to do this!


Also, I know you're probably not reading this any more, but I just wanted to tell you that I'm going to get chickens soon and all of their names are going to be Cluck Palahniuk.

I hate you.


You mentioned that you wrote most of Fight Club whilst listening to The Downward Spiral. Has Trent Reznor got in contact with you to let you know how fucking cool that is?

Mr. Reznor needs to keep a better grip on his address book. My worst ( okay, one of my worst ) stalker got my contact info from Trent's book and ( not lying, wish i were ) it was a long-term mess.


Hi Chuck! I just want to first say that you're a badass and your books are the shit and whatever.

I've been thinking about what question I wanted to ask you since this AMA was announced. At first the only question that stuck out in my mind was "Whatever happened to the Rant sequels?" Mostly because Rant is my favorite book of yours and it totally fucking blew my mind every time I turned the page. I figured that question would be coming up a shit ton in this AMA anyway, though.

So I guess the next question I'd want to ask is Where do you come up with these characters? Your characters are probably the most intricate and flawed, most seemingly selfish characters I've ever read about. Do these characters more accurately depict your views on society as a whole or are they more a reflection on how you see yourself?

Also what advice do you have for someone who has never written anything longer than a short story? If I remember correctly, Invisible Monsters started out as a short story that you later adapted to novel length. Did you ever get completely stuck along the way?

Sorry that's a much longer post than I thought I'd write. It's just very rare that anyone I truly admire does an AMA. Thanks for doing this, by the way!

What? Molly Ringwald did one. She not GOOD enough for you? Why, when I was your age we used to worship her. I think somebody owes Ms. Ringwald an apology...


Hi Chuck! I just want to first say that you're a badass and your books are the shit and whatever.

I've been thinking about what question I wanted to ask you since this AMA was announced. At first the only question that stuck out in my mind was "Whatever happened to the Rant sequels?" Mostly because Rant is my favorite book of yours and it totally fucking blew my mind every time I turned the page. I figured that question would be coming up a shit ton in this AMA anyway, though.

So I guess the next question I'd want to ask is Where do you come up with these characters? Your characters are probably the most intricate and flawed, most seemingly selfish characters I've ever read about. Do these characters more accurately depict your views on society as a whole or are they more a reflection on how you see yourself?

Also what advice do you have for someone who has never written anything longer than a short story? If I remember correctly, Invisible Monsters started out as a short story that you later adapted to novel length. Did you ever get completely stuck along the way?

Sorry that's a much longer post than I thought I'd write. It's just very rare that anyone I truly admire does an AMA. Thanks for doing this, by the way!

Regarding characters... consider that all of my characters are introduced as fully formed. They've each established a way of being that includes a lie -- usually a scam that makes people "like" them without the risk of the character having to be emotionally vulnerable. My personal theory is: Childhood is those years when people tell you to be Less Sensitive, and adulthood begins when people begin telling you to be More Sensitive. My characters are at that cusp. They need to break out of their childhood shell and risk being known by at least one other person. That, to me, is romance. That needs to happen for the child to become an adult.


I once brought up the quote "Self-improvement is masturbation, self-destruction is the answer" to my high-school philosophy class taught by a man who was planning on becoming a priest the next year.

After seeing Fight-Club and reading Choke, the idea meant a lot to me at the time but looking back...semi-cringe

My class didn't get it. Everyone was surprised I brought up the word masturbation in a highschool class where we were getting our religion credit. My teacher wanted me to explain how it was like masturbation, so I stood at the front of my class stammering, trying to explain how self-improvement is pretty much just fucking yourself. ..

So my question is, how would you have described this quote to my highschool class? and do you personally live following this idea?

I'm safe in saying this because David Foster Wallace said that eventually your writing is masturbation. Regardless of how much readers enjoy it, you're really writing because it gets you off.

And I do mean it, but Tyler meant it more. The pleasures of writing include acting like exaggerations of your most-extreme self. A word to the wise? You should probably check the potty talk in class. Dude.


Hi, Chuck. Thanks for doing this AmA.

I'm a journalism student at UO. While I think the program has been great, there's a bleak atmosphere over the future of journalism. Where do you think the field is headed? Has your knowledge of journalism affected your writing?

Good question! I was in a similar boat, as part of the generation who watched "All the President's Men" and decided to become journalists. ( stupid, stoopid, stoopid ) We glutted the field. Likewise, my friend and fellow writer, Chelsea Cain, was a journalism major ( and got her post-grad degree ). The good news is that journalism trains you to be observant and to communicate clearly ( if not spell accurately ). Those are the skills that will save you. Say hello to Tim Gleason for me, and enjoy the dazzling new Allen Hall.


Good question! I was in a similar boat, as part of the generation who watched "All the President's Men" and decided to become journalists. ( stupid, stoopid, stoopid ) We glutted the field. Likewise, my friend and fellow writer, Chelsea Cain, was a journalism major ( and got her post-grad degree ). The good news is that journalism trains you to be observant and to communicate clearly ( if not spell accurately ). Those are the skills that will save you. Say hello to Tim Gleason for me, and enjoy the dazzling new Allen Hall.

Me, again. Your question has been weighing on me all weekend. Through school I worked various newspaper internships; most paid minimum wage or nothing, but they put me in the company of other writers. Late at night, at little newspapers like The Cottage Grove Sentinel, we'd sit around ( drinking beer ) writing headlines on press deadline. Each headline had to summarize a story, be clever and appealing, and fit within an exact physical space ( not be too long or too short ). That seems like an exercise very specific to journalism, but it's still the skill I use when trying to write fiction.

If I can still offer you some advice... please identify the aspect of journalism that attracts you the most. Then, look for that experience in a wider variety of careers.


Reading Phoenix really tied me over until October. Can we expect the release of more short stories in between books?

Thank you! I have a monstrous story called "Cannibal" in Playboy right now. Bless them for not shying away from my subject matter. Cannibal is artsy ( so much for Minimalism ) but it's more gruesome than "Guts." Next week, I'll be in Bellingham, Washington, doing an event for Village Books. A new story ( my best story, ever, with a happy ending, too boot ), this year's tour story, and an evening of experimenting with the face of book events.


At a signing you told me that if you knew that all that was going to turn into all this, that you would have hired a stand-in so they could do all the interviews and traveling and signing and what-nots. Were we making small talk or does that shit get old?

The shit never gets old. But I got old.


It's rare for a writer's first book to be as successful as Fight Club was. Were you surprised by the success of the book? How did the success of Fight Club affect your life generally?

Please let me address a misperception. 'Fight Club' was a huge failure. Most of the hardcovers were going to be pulped. They were unsold when the movie opened... and then the movie was a flop. It has taken years ( decades ) for the story to build an audience. What's amazing is that it still resonates for young readers; it's never become dated. ( he shakes his head in disbelief )


Please let me address a misperception. 'Fight Club' was a huge failure. Most of the hardcovers were going to be pulped. They were unsold when the movie opened... and then the movie was a flop. It has taken years ( decades ) for the story to build an audience. What's amazing is that it still resonates for young readers; it's never become dated. ( he shakes his head in disbelief )

For further comfort, please read "And So It Goes," a biography about Kurt Vonnegut. It feels great to see how his first books were lackluster non-successes.


Hi Mr. Palahniuk! I really love your style; it heavily influenced my writings in my English class. And I'm sorry this question isn't like a thought-provoking question or anything. Or sorry if this has been asked and answered before somewhere.

Why are there 2 Walters in Fight Club?

Because ( like the great Brontosaurus ) I have a brain the size of a pea.


Were you drinking before the start of this AMA, Mr. Palahniuk?

No, but I is counting the minutes until I can glug-glug. These interactions assume a kind-of looking good posing, and I wanted to avoid that. My hope is that I might actually say something valid, but by accident. You know?


So what's Chelsea Cain really like?

Do I detect the sweet smell of gossip? When you're a writer ( one who comes from non-writing, trailer-living ancestors ) you seek out other writers and try to copy how they behave. I watch carefully to see which fork Ms. Cain uses to eat her fish. Still, she is a sphinx.

To ogle the mysterious Ms. Cain for yourself, contact Village Books in Bellingham, WA. She and I will be there next Wednesday, the 24th, for an evening of shenanigans.


This AMA is fake. The real one is on its way. Source: Chuck's facebook page.

Dear Nolk,

Don't mask your disappointment with denial. This is the true, dull me. I hit some darned link, earlier, and I'm routed through some web-thing I can't begin to fathom.


What do you think of people getting tattoos of your writings on their body? Flattering or what?

(Next month I'm getting "nothing is static" from Fight Club, and couldn't be more excited. Thank you for saving my life with your work, Chuck. Wouldn't be here without ya.)

You should get something from Lidia Yuknavitch inked on you. I will if you will.


Do you keep in touch with Amy Hempel? She's one of my favorite authors and I know you have repeatedly mentioned her as an influence and favorite author of yours.

Amy Hemple makes my life worth living. If you do nothing else with your life, find a copy of her essay "A Full-Service Shelter" and love it.


according to chuck's verified twitter, this link is legit. https://twitter.com/chuckpalahniuk

Oh, thank you. ( but really, this is Morgan Molly Freeman Ringwald )


Oh, thank you. ( but really, this is Morgan Molly Freeman Ringwald )

And for the moment I'm on-line in an internet cafe, trying to patch some holes in this chaos. Wednesday night I spent the first hour of the Reddit lying on my back on the kitchen floor, plugging-in and unplugging my modem and router. By the time I was online there were already 3000 posts. It's hard to fix connectivity issues while dogs are licking your face.


Hey Chuck---

I just found out I have to make a gigantic revision on my ms. Any words of wisdom?

Thanks, Lauren (ps I <3 LitR!)

Get ready to hate me. To Really hate me. When I have to do painful revisions I shave my head. It's like dying, and it makes me feel better about killing passages I've written and still love.

But that's just my method.


I saw you speak when I was 17 in San Francisco. You took a swig out of a Jack Daniel's bottle at the end...my friend and I almost stole it. Shoulda woulda coulda.

Also, what if there was a Haunted movie where each story was done by a different director?

A secret truth? Those bottles on that tour... they were filled with Lipton's tea. I wanted a sight gag that would look cool.


I just wanted to say I love you.

Dear McSealClubber --

Prove your love. Go to http://byl.nr/13aKPCY and make me a quarter.

xoxxxox ( big kiss )


Do you have any further plans with Starry Eyes now that the Kickstarter is funded?

Oh, thank God that Dennis made his goal. I was holding my breath. For now I'm focused on signing and inscribing the books and CDs that will go out to contributors. I've held off asking to read the screenplay because I'd like to be surprised by the finished film.


Holy shit Chuck, are you really three hours into this AMA and still responding to questions? That's an amazing dedication to your fans.

I still hate you for making me buy all your books though. Besides always making me think, they're terribly fucking catchy.

You wanna know a secret? I f-ck'n love catchy "hooks." Like you'd see on inspirational posters or hear in songs. Those brain worms. And I live to re-hear the Bill Withers song "Ain't No Sunshine" because of the extended "I know, I know, I know, I know..." section. It's like a mantra, this repetition where language begins to break down and sound like music, like a bird's repeating song/call. Near the end of the story "Romance" I tried the same trick by repeating "And life goes around and life goes around and life goes around..." chanting as many cycles of that sentence as possible. It feels like being a human prayer wheel atop a mountain in Nepal.

That's why "Fight Club" is so "sticky." The repetition "the first rule, the second rule, etc." If your reader comes away from the story remembering even one line, you've succeeded. Why CAN'T stories be more like songs?


Sorry for not posting this sooner, I was wary since somebody said this was a fake.

Thank you SO much for being here. I've read everything you've written and I consider you a huge influence not only on the work I do as an artist, but on my daily life. Your books are almost single-handedly responsible for keeping me alive during one of the darkest times of my life. As cliche as it sounds, you literally saved my life, however indirectly. So thank you. I have a few questions and an additional statement.

•Can you please go into a little detail about the the level of research you do for your books?

•What can you tell us about the movie adaptations of Survivor, Invisible Monsters, and Diary?

•What has influenced your decision to keep partner un-named?

•Can you explain your decision to change your "voice" in the way you write more recent books like Pygmy? Is it simply for immersion's sake?

•What "transgressional fiction" books do you recommend outside of your own?

•I want to extend my sincerest condolences for the loss of your parents. I know it has been some time but still, from a fan, I'm sorry you had to go through that.

Damn, I suck at this. Could I be more slow? How about one answer? I wasn't always a public person, but I've been with someone ( Mike ) for decades. Early on, we talked about the growing attention, and he wanted to avoid the spotlight. I have to admire his resolve to remain private. I've talked to too many celebrated people who lost their true loves because of this issue.


Damn, I suck at this. Could I be more slow? How about one answer? I wasn't always a public person, but I've been with someone ( Mike ) for decades. Early on, we talked about the growing attention, and he wanted to avoid the spotlight. I have to admire his resolve to remain private. I've talked to too many celebrated people who lost their true loves because of this issue.

For transgressive fiction, I always go back and re-read "The Informers" and "Rules of Attraction" by Bret Ellis. And Irvine Welsh's "Trainspotting."

If you're looking for something more current, check out "Dora" by Lidia Yuknavitch.


Chuck,

Saw you speak in San Francisco this past year. You told the story about how the idea for Choke came to you - it made me near speechless. I am wondering if that actually happened, or if you're just telling stories to get a rise out of people.

If I told you the "lying down in the street story" it was the truth.


Palahniuk describes the moment the inspiration for ‘Choke’ hit him as a drive down a long country road somewhere in the Pacific Northwest. He was hit with the urge to stop his car on the shoulder, leave his headlights on, and go lie down face-up in the light until an authority figure came to his rescue. He assumed since he was wearing nice clothing, the authority figure would assume he’d been hurt and look after him until more help could come. It was that concept – a stranger embracing you, keeping you safe – that helped give birth to Victor Mancini, the main character who commences choking to death in restaurants to be saved by those that don’t know him. Palahniuk claims he didn’t actually go through with the act because he would have gotten filthy.

Source.

But wait... it gets even MORE maudlin. The above episode happened a few days after my father's murder, when I was swamped with depression and needed some assurance that life would continue. In a way this sort of "scam" echoes the parts in "Fight Club" where the narrator attends support groups because they allow him to express his anxiety and grief about his own life. You should also know that I didn't ACTUALLY lie in the road. I was wearing my best clothes ( a necktie! ) and didn't want to risk wrecking them. My emotional needs are always secondary to my wardrobe. Thanks for coming to the event in San Francisco!


Chuck, Have you ever used drugs (psychedelics) to get past writers block or finish a deadline(stimulants)? Is this question to personal?

I don't think anyone here will judge you.

No, if anything, drugs kept me from writing for years. They are a false source of inspiration. For me, at least.


when and where is the next bedtime stories for adults? can people wear see-through lingerie?

You, my dear, may wear see-thru anything. And it was wonderful to see you walking down the street, yesturday. My lovely shill.

Bedtime Stories for Adults will be in Bellingham, WA next week, please phone 1-800-392-BOOK. It will be life changing.


Is Sam Rockwell's ass as amazing in person?

Angels weep when they look at Sam's butt. Even in pants.


Angels weep when they look at Sam's butt. Even in pants.

To clarify, days later, I meant this as a complement. Angels weep at the sight of beautiful things.


Hey, I had the pleasure of meeting you at a book reading in Toronto a few years ago on the Pygmy tour. You sent fans that dressed up boxes filled with stocking stuffers (and a lot of glitter). Two Questions: 1. How long on average does it take you to put together packages for fans 2. What is the weirdest thing you have sent a fan.

Thanks for doing this, I love your work so much.

The boxes! I'm always looking for clever, novel things to send but my favorites are boxes of chocolates. They seem like such a luxury. The oddest thing ( thing? ) was some of the cremated remains of the writer Shirley Jackson, who wrote "The Haunting of Hill House." Her daughter sent me the ashes, and I sent them ( in a carved antique box ) to my editor, Gerry Howard. I wish I had more of the same to send my editor at Byliner, Amy Grace Lloyd. She deserves some baked writer ashes. Shout out to Amy.


You send me a necklace and in beads wrote both our names on it, it is the coolest thing I own.

Someday I'll explain the necklaces more fully. They are a strange nostalgic ritual. My father was a rock collector ( i'm sorry if i've explained this to you already ) and my earliest memories are of hunting for agates with him. Making the necklaces keeps his memory fresh in my mind, but it also exercises my brains in a way that words don't. Most writers seem to have a "visual arts" hobby. Capote made his collages, Mailer drew pictures, Vonnegut did his famous doodles. Tennessee Williams painted. For me, the act of collecting stones and assembling them in a series fulfills this same function. It uses ageless, immortal things ( like words ), and the act ( like writing ) demonstrates patience and time. Blah, blah blah.


Hiya Chuck,

A family friend of mine sent you a letter a long time ago and you responded with some of your old tapes and recordings. I always thought that was really cool of you. Her name was Jessica Morehead, she died in a car accident back in 2009. I still keep in touch with her dad. http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/sacbee/obituary.aspx?page=lifestory&pid=131078287#fbLoggedOut

I am so sorry. Unhappiness comes out of nowhere... and that's why we need to make the effort to make happiness occur. If disaster can be random then my goal is to create as much joy as I can. 'Nuff said.


[No question]

Hello? Testing, testing... thank you. My web connection is getting sketchy, and I can't seem to get beyond the first 1500 questions. My apologies for that. In the future I'll do this in town, where I'll have real service. Here, it's the woods. I'm very beholding to John at Byliner and Dennis at The Cult for walking me through this process. I am a Luddite, but their patience and help has made me a Reddit convert. Thank you -- even you Anne Marie in Las Vegas! Say hello to your look-alike aunt, Maureen. I must go drink something alcoholic and re-read Monica Drake's new novel, "The Stud Book." I look forward to disappointing you all at a future date. If I overlooked your question it's not your fault. It's me. I'm a dick. I'll Shut Up Now.


Once you visited Austin and my gf and I got blowup dolls signed by you. Fastforward about a year or so later, my landlord is showing my apartment to prospective tenants and the blowup dolls are in my living room in plain sight. He was very upset about that. Thank you for everything.

Those poor dolls. In Denver I gave out hundreds and later lurked in a friend's car, peeking through tinted windows as people carried fake sex dolls all over the downtown core. Such a glorious sight! If I could keep time in a bottle...

Not to sound preachy, but it's so important to keep creating good, bold memories. Once I realized -- post-college -- that all of my best anecdotes began with the words "This one time in school..." That's when I realized I was in a rut... so I joined Cacophony Society.


vaguely related, unsolicited anecdote: i was pooping and reading haunted. i turned off the light and for the first time discovered that the cover is glow in the dark. in the mirror. i also discovered that i should have sat there a little longer.

A glow-in-the-dark cover. Forgive me for bragging, but neither Hemingway or Fitzgerald ever got such a great cover. Now I'm pushing for a scratch-and-sniff cover. Fingers crossed.


Hi Chuck!

What is the status of the Invisible Monsters film adaptation? I check The Cult every so often for updates but I am hoping you have some insider news. It is one of my favorites and I hope it is as well adapted as Choke was.

Speaking of Choke. Is Sam Rockwell awesome? I think he did such a great job as Victor (and Anjelica as Ida), I can't imagine another actor playing that character and really capturing the essence of what I imagine Victor to be.

Hi Blowjobs4everyone --

It seems like I can't keep dodging the movie question. Truth is, I'm not paying very much attention. Putting a movie project together is so complicated. The details change from hour to hour, and whatever I pass along seems to become obsolete misinformation the moment it leaves my mouth ( fingers? ). Good news is that "Haunted" is financed and ready to start production this summer. Once the director is ready to announce his cast and locations, I'll pass along more information.


Do you feel your comparisons to Kurt Vonnegut are warranted? How do you feel about that?

Flattered. Except... that mustache, ugh.


Did you have any say in the Pixies song used in Fight Club? Such an incredible music choice to close the film. .

Oh, you are so young. I'd actually asked for a Donna Summer song, but David Fincher looked at me like I was crazy.


Always considered this the most epic and PERFECT closing scene/song combo

Epic and perfect? Yeah, until I went to Italy and was duped into standing at the bottom of a huge movie screen -- post 9-11 -- as the CG buildings toppled around me. That, that felt icky. But it's still a good song.


Love reading your books. reading them is like anal; You feel dirty afterwards but enjoy it. Where did the inspiration for the character Tyler Durden come from?

Dear nolimitz4me --

I couldn't have said it better, myself. But, please, let's remember that my adorable 15-year-old niece is in the house. "In the house" is 80's speak for online.


Everyone thinks I'm insane when I talk about fight club being primarily a love story. They are just typically dark love stories, you know sorta like real life

A secret: Fight Club is "The Great Gatsby" but with more punching and insomnia. A triangle. A 30-year-old boy in crisis ( nick carraway? ) A gunshot resolution. Voila.


The first night I met my ex boyfriend, we were drunk and passionately in lust. We had the most intense connection and mid-make out, he says to me, "you met me at a very strange time in my life"... I melted.

Anyone else would probably find it cheesy that he repeated a quote to me, but I thought it was the best thing ever.

See! I love how simple, memorable lines can cue elaborate, shared memories. It's beautiful. Old friends will telephone and just cackle one line ( "I'd kill for those ruby slippers!" ) then hang up, and I'll know who it was, and the reference, and be laughing.

Is this what song writers call a "hook"? I like to think so. And I always feel giddy when I hear some newsmaker say, "The first rule of Fight Club is..." How many writers get that thrill?

My favorite quote is from Amy Hemple: "What dogs want is for no one to ever leave." Isn't that lovely?


How do you feel about Target selling Fight Club shirts?

Argh! Why does 20th Century Fox get the merchandising money? Here I am, selling my blood for enough money to buy caviar. Life sucks ass.


Hey, you visited my friend in the hospital after a reading in Lansing, MI. He had been hit by a drunk driver and couldn't come, obviously, so you were good enough to stay out late and visit him.

No questions, but thanks!

Did You Know... I remember that. Your friend was with several people ( five? ) and they were driving to get pizza on the night they were hit. Some died ( two? ). He had long Trent Reznor hair. His mother wept at the hospital, and I will never forget that night ( actually, morning, because it was long past midnight ). That was eight, nine years ago? I will never, ever forget it. You were good friends to drag me there, and the local publicist ( hurray Michelle, you are the hottest MILF! ) was a hero for taking me to and from the hospital.


My cousin saw you in a bar one time and he was super drunk and saw that you were walking by. He lifted up his shirt and yelled "Hey, Chuck, will you sign my boobs?" and I guess you got somewhat offended and walked away without signing them.

My question is: Why didn't you sign his boobs?

That wasn't me. I have an evil twin. Several.


Greetings, Mr. Paluh Palalala Palin Chuck, I have a question I would must humbly appreciate you answering, your lordness.

How do you manage to focus on writing for long periods of time? I love to write, but after about half an hour of typing I slowly start losing focus until I'm just staring at my computer, zoning out. Or I come onto this website.

Follow-up question: Will drugs make me words better?

How's this? Every twenty or thirty minutes, take a break and do something mindless. Wash some dishes. Fold some laundry. Pull some weeds. A physical task seems to refresh my imagination. It's like those moments in conversation when you say the wrong thing... then, when it's too late and you're halfway to your car, you imagine the perfect thing that you Should've said. By taking a little break from writing, you relax and reflect. Then inspiration hits. Then you'll be excited to write for another 2-30 minutes.

Try it.


Hi Chuck,

Okay, look, I'm just going to come out and say it, even though you probably won't even see this, even though it'll get voted down through the pool drain, even though I might forever be known as that jackass on reddit who criticized Chuck Palahniuk, but just gonna come out and say it, here it goes.

I think your stories need to be better.

Don't get me wrong. I dig your style, and in Fight Club and Choke your style is the bedrock that lets these insane narratives pass through verisimilitude's version of a TSA checkpoint. But. In Haunted, for example, and in Snuff, and in Lullabye, (jesus, are those pitchforks? Are those torches?) you've got this great style, but the stories themselves don't justify the style, and sometimes, it comes across as if you're writing out-there stuff just for the sake of being out-there, because you can.

I guess my question is, which one of your works do you think is the most finely crafted, the most polished, and which one the least? Why? What's your favorite book by another author?

I'm not gonna apologize for being critical, but I will say thanks for doing this AMA, and do, kindly, keep writing books, however you want to, whether the asshole minority (including myself) loves all of them or not.

You're not an asshole. I have first dibs on that title.

There are parts of "Fight Club" and "Choke" that make me shudder with regret. ( why was the hypnosis stuff in there near the end? ) While "Pygmy" makes me hugely happy. I got to really screw with language! And "Tell-All" let me say something important about how people accrue authority by usurping the life stories of other people. Every book is an experiment, some more successful than others, and I regret none of them. My least favorite was "Stranger Than Fiction" ( especially that title ), but some people tell me that it's their favorite among my books.

Goodness, and the guts it took to read "Guts" in public... what's the point of writing a story if it doesn't force me to be a braver person? God forbid I sit at home wondering, "Will people like this?"


Hey Palahniuk! Glad you could join us for an AMA.

My ex and I met you at a reading in Eugene back in November. Do you happen to remember the big guy with the glasses asking about the Portland Youth Silent Film Fest? You signed my book with a note of encouragement and it meant a whole helluva lot to me.

Thanks again, man. Hope you're well!

Yes, I remember you! But I can't recall if you were the "Moby Dick-ish" whale movie guy. I have the screening copy of your movie on my desk right now.


Hey Chuck, I worked with Marilyn Manson back in the day (early 90's) when he was starting out with the Spooky kids on South Beach. Most of us who knew him during those years, well, let's just say he's not looked upon favorably at all. I read your account with him, and it left me wondering, since my experience with him was miles apart from which you wrote. I'm curious, it's been said that Manson is a master of catering to his audience, so do you think it's possible he was putting on a face for you, or do you think perhaps his time in the limelight affected him and possibly caused him to be a bit more... humble? Thoughts?

Hey Lizzie --

My gut reaction was my guide. Maybe he'd mellowed since you knew him -- don't we all, over time? But my impression was that he was a polite kid from the Midwest who'd identified the worst parts of himself, and he'd developed the skills to express those parts on demand. Like every performer I know he's a crazed idiot on stage, but a pussy cat backstage. Just to watch him interact with Rose McGowan's dogs, that made me like him.

Do you still live in Florida? You are so lucky.


WHAT HAPPENED TO THE CARROT?!?!?!?

The carrot? I shudder to think. I still wonder if the mother ( yes, the real mother of a former-friend of mine ) discarded the paring knife that was used... If household utensils could only talk.


Mr. Chuck,

I love the cover art on your books (except the glow in the dark version of haunted, it creeps me out at night)
What goes into deciding the cover art; as in how do you decide the subject matter and the artist?

and also

Why make a "remixed" version of invisible monsters? Was it a sales scheme?

Why the Remix? The publisher, W.W.Norton ( shout out to Amy Cherry ), approached me with the proposal. There had been an on-line petition for a special hardcover version, and Norton wanted to fill the demand. Initially they'd asked me to write an introduction for the new edition. I counter-proposed re-structuring the book and trying to make it the jumpy, twitchy, non-linear mess that I'd first conceived. The publisher agreed. That's it.


Just wanted you to know that I bawled my eyes out while reading the scene in Choke with Victor, Ida, and the pudding. Still my favorite book four years later.

I've heard people criticize your writing for being full of too much "shock value". I have my own thoughts about why you include it, but what is your reason behind it, if any? Thanks.

Please, let me address the "shock value" stuff. A million years ago, when the earth was cooling, I dreamed of being a Catholic priest. The idea that someone got paid to listen to everyone's darkest secrets, wow, that sounded like a good career. Fast forward to now, and people see me as un-shockable and nonjudgmental so they confession to me their worst selves. It's wonderful and tragic and hilarious, but I need to turn that stuff into fiction so it doesn't become my burden. Also, other people flat-out ask me to make a specific, terrible situation seem funny. They relate some awful scene from their own life and ask me to disarm its drama with humor. In therapy, I think the process is called "recontexturalizing." Shifting the context of an event to make it bearable. I invent very little of my "shocking" material; I'm mostly just collecting true-life horror stories.


You are Jack's ____________. ?

Undescended testicle.


For me the movie glorifies Tyler for a longer period than the book does, so I have mixed feelings regarding this. I hope he sees your question and answers it.

No duh! Of course the movie showcased Mr. Durden. Brad Pitt made that project bankable. He was the little engine that pulled that whole train.


Hey Chuck! Big fan. Who would win in a fight? Tyler Durden, Rant Casey, or Agent 67?

No human being or fictional character can survive the slash-slam destruction of the Pounding Peccary maneuver.


If you're still in Portland, do you want to get coffee sometime?

(Not like a date, but because you seem cool, and I freaking love coffee).

Strictly as a legal formality, but my attorney advises me to obtain full frontal nude photos of everyone with whom I drink coffee. Unless, of course, you're a minor. 'Just saying. Be sure to catch my cameo on next season's "To Catch a Predator."


Was there any traumatic childhood experiences that inspired you to write such amazingly fucked up stuff?

Traumas? I wouldn't know where to start. Aber ich bin echt nur ein Tranentier.


I have been a huge fan of your work since I read Choke and Fight Club. Your writing style has this unique feel to it that I have always been drawn to like a moth to a flame. I have a million questions but my mind is drawing a damn blank, so I will shoot from the hip; How did it feel to see people drop like flies when you read "Guts" in public? Like, what was your initial reaction? Also, any tips to give a young budding wordsmith such as myself on how to make a career in writing? Thank you so much for doing this AMA and I hope to one day meet you. You truly have been a source of inspiration in my life and I feel like I at least owe you a drink. 

Dear Woyaboy --

Do you remember when you were little and someone could terrify you with a campfire story? Every once in a long while I find a story with the same power. Shirley Jackson's "The Lottery" or Mark Richard's "Strays" are such stories. When I read "Guts" and see people listening raptly, I feel great. It's wonderful to see that short stories can still carry such power.

This past week, in Bellingham, I read a new story called "Zombies" ( title likely to change ) and it had a similar strong effect. It's slated for the Nov. Playboy, and it's my tour story for "Doomed" this fall. Writers in my workshop -- my thanks to Lidia Yuknavitch for her considerable heroic editting help -- have been shocked by the sweetness of the "Zombies" ending. No, it's not like me at all. But it will still piss off many people.


Hi Chuck, big non-american fan here, so sorry for any grammar mistake. 2 questions.

1- Will you someday publish your old essays again? I mean like an essay collection with all the ones you had on your website.

2- What can we expect from Doomed? Can you give us a little taste of what's yet to come?

Thanks.

The essay collection... Ideally, I'd like to add more essays. Every time some writer teaches me a new trick, or I recognize one, I'd like to document it and pass it along. Doing so forces me to examine my own methods. At the same time I want to provide Dennis with exclusive content so I don't feel I can dictate how he posts the essays. It's a slippery patch of ice: I'm depicting methods and distinctions taught to me by Tom Spanbauer, and Tom's teaching things he's learned from big-name editors/writers like Gordon Lish. I'm not comfortable putting my name on such accumulated wisdom. So I defer to Dennis on this.

And "Doomed"... makes "Rant" look easy and breezy. Never have I twisted a plot into such a tight knot. Madison returns to Earth and finds that her parents have taken all the advice she gave them over the phone, from Hell, and they've launched a new world religion with the ultimate goal of destroying the planet. Oh, and there's an unacceptable amount of sexual violence, but it will make you laugh.


[deleted]

You're 23? That should be enough. Oh, to be 23...!

MCKaney, you will never have as much energy and daring as you do now. Over the next ten years, gather everything. Hoard experiences, writing tricks, ideas. Once you're 31 you'll begin to slow down, then get serious about novel writing. By that point you'll have a pile of material you can draw from for the rest of your career.

Go, be a language and lifestory vampire. Go to parties and bars and suck non-writers dry.


Dear Mr. Palahnuik,

I write to protest the spelling and pronunciation of your last name. It is an affront to all goodly speakers of the Queen's English, and should be rightly stricken from the record and replaced with something more suitable, such as Jeffrey, or Livingston.

In conclusion,

Kindly fuck yourself, a Fan.

Dear Hometodd ( if that IS your real name ) --

Every time I sign a book I wish my name was "Amy Tan." Six letters!

Oh, and it's h-n-i-u-k. You illiterate Dickinsonian Fan Boy.


Thanks for doing this AMA Chuck, it means a lot to me and my brothers as we have read all of your novels! (Haunted still gives me nightmares)

A lot of people complain that book-to-movie adaptations ruin the initial experience for the reader. How do you feel toward the movie versions of Fight Club and Choke? Did they meet your expectations, or did they lack in something you really wanted? Do you actually prefer one of the movies to the books you wrote?

You're welcome. It's taken me two weeks, but I'm responding to your post.

In both the movies you cite, I wish the story had included the eventual unmasking and humiliation of the narrators. "Jack" is shamed in front of the support groups he's deceived, and Victor is rejected by all the people who think they've saved him. That "loss of face" is the worst situation that most young people can imagine. Especially young men see a loss of status or social standing as more threatening than physical pain. To show a reader his worst fear, and show a character surviving that disaster, that's my goal. Movies almost never ( maybe never ) depict a character being humiliated on that deepest level, and I wonder if it's because actors dread that possibility more than anyone else.


I can't recall ever reading any of your books. Which one do you recommend I start with?

That's easy, start by reading Lidia Yuknavitch's new novel, "Dora." Then read Monica Drake's "The Stud Book."

Then, read all of Amy Hemple and Denis Johnson. Then, read my novel "Lullaby," but don't get thrown by the flash-forwards. 'kay?


I can't recall ever reading any of your books. Which one do you recommend I start with?

Most first-timers like "Lullaby" -- but do me a favor, please? Skip the first chapter. Why did I stick that prologue-y thing on the front? Was I high? Everything after that is better. 'Promise.


Hi Chuck!

Being in IT, after watching Fight Club I was left with a question. What would happen next after the large banking industries restored their off site data backups? How would the characters react when within a few days all the data they believed destroyed was back in place like nothing happened?

Ask David Fincher! It was his idea to explode the banking system. Golly, Proudcanadianeh, you're such a kill-joy!

As my best friend in college used to sing: "Every party needs a pooper, that's why we invited you..."


Many believe that a writer's best works are when they first start, and others think you're most creative when you're in your 20s. As someone who started in their 30s, do you have an opinion on this/do you think it matters?

Thanks for doing this AMA!

My pet theory is that a writer needs his/her 20's in order to gather material that she/he will write about for the rest of a sedentary life. It's fine to take notes, but no writer should spend his ( oh, to hell with the gender of pronouns ) youth in the big chunks of solitude that writing requires. First, lead an interesting life -- know interesting people and develop an ear for how good anecdotes work. Second, become a writer.


Thanks for doing this AMA. Your novels kept me sane when I was in jail for 4 months. Anyways, why did Rant chew black tar? Also, what is one of your biggest fears?

PS.. I was in jail for drugs. Don't fucking judge me.

Did I judge you? When the writer Jim Goad told me how much writing he did while in jail I kind-of envied him. And if you've never chewed tar... well, you've never been a poor, bored child in a dismal rural setting. The arid, hot desert around Burbank, WA is perfect for tar chewing. Our neighbor, Beth Glass, showed everyone how to find clean tar leaking through broken asphalt. We chewed it instead of gum, all summer. Gum cost money. Tar is free. Plus tar stained our teeth black, a very sexy look. Then we discovered Skol.

A biggest fear? Bridges. I will drive hours to avoid a high bridge. I'll pay to take a taxi over one instead of walking. Now, don't YOU judge me.


I remember reading a piece by you called "Burying the I" on how to effectively begin a first person narrative without alienating the reader. This was a huge influence for me in my own writing. What other basic tips do you recommend for novice-writers?

You mean "Submerging the I" and God bless the writer Peter Christopher for teaching it to me. RIP, Peter, we miss you.

Some other writing tips to keep in mind:

Use attribution and gesture to pace your dialogue more effectively.

Always use description as a chance to describe the person doing the describing. For example, how would a plumber describe a room versus how a painter would describe the same room. Use description to show the reader the specific way a character perceives the world.

Avoid abstracts. No 100-degree temperatures. No six-foot-tall men. No 100-pound weaklings.

Read your work aloud, and listen for when you get bored.

I'll come back and add to this list as more things occur to me. I could write an entire textbook about generating and sustaining energy and momentum in plot. The most common flaw I see in fiction is a writer's inability to create and escalate tension and conflict. Don't get me started!


If you could permanently remove one word from the english language, what would it be?

"Literally"


Mr. Palahniuk,
I love the way you throw so much trivia into your novels- like about all the poisons used in paint in Diary, celebrity trivia in Snuff, or history of and how to make soap in Fight Club. So, I'm curious, how do you go about research for your novels?

In college, I knew a couple who posed as young newlyweds and went around adopting pets from the classified ads. They'd dress sweetly and croon over the nice cats and dogs that people needed to find new homes for. Once they'd gotten the animal this boy and girl would sell it, instantly, to animal testing laboratories. It was dispicable. Sickening. But it's how they paid for college. From what I hear, they're still assholes.

I started to write a story about them, one time, but my editor -- Gerry Howard -- told me to drop it. He was right. The whole scenario was disgusting.


This interview was transcribed from an "ask me anything" question and answer session with Chuck Palahniuk conducted on Reddit on 2013-04-17. The Reddit AMA can be found here.